Unofficially Official - 10% down, 20% to go.

So, it's been ten weeks since I started going to the gym and I've officially lost 10% of my body weight. I weight my self mid week because I had gone on a short vacation, and unofficially (because it's not the proper weigh in day) I'm down to 298, which is 31 pounds less than when I first started. I'll be honest, I wanted to celebrate, go out get a big cake and just devour the entire thing, but for some reason the thought of such an act made me sick and I didn't do it lol. Truth is I've worked my ass off to get to this point, and it seemed like a waste to give it all away after all that.

The past few weeks have been particularly hard for me to be honest, not so much the eating, at least I have that part down. It's more the going to the gym thing. For some reason I cannot drag my ass out of bed in the morning, I have a hard time pushing myself. It might have something to do with the fact that I was having a hard time remembering why I'm doing this. What most people don't realize, is I've always been a big guy. At the weight I'm currently at right now I officially weigh the same as I did when I was in grade ten. I know, big deal right... but when you consider that January 2008 I was up near 350 lbs, this is a loooooong ways down already. I guess it's hard to look in the mirror and tell yourself that you're still not good enough, you still have tons of work to do when you think you honestly look good... compared to what I used to know anyway. By far the longest 2.5 months of my life, but also the most productive.

I think I'm good now again though, a couple of thoughts I'd rather not share because I don't know who will read this in the end, and I think I found my motivation again. Lets just say that sometimes the ghosts of our past haunt us, but with the right spin they can more than inspire us... Or I'm just lying to myself to get my ass out of bed in the morning; but at least I'm back to posting!

Just trying to name this post... 10% down, 20% to go. It's weird to sit here and think that I can actually go another 20%. When I first started my goal was around 270, and I thought that was stretching it, that the chances of giving up before that point where very very high. Now, I'm looking at it thinking... maybe I could weight 240? That's a lot of work, I know... but to think that by summer if I work hard enough I could be... sorry let me rephrase that... I will be at such a low weight! Ok, maybe 240 is overdoing it honestly, I mean that would mean that in 7.5 months I'd be down 90 lbs... even the stupidest idiot who does this for a living would laugh at me. Maybe I'll see how things go when I'm 270 but it's the thought that I could... that it IS possible... Who knew?