So, this week was an oddly productive week, although I am quite disapointed with my progress. I lost more than I wanted, somehow... but I have that gut feeling that I should have done better. Went to the gym once this week; after the week previous that's pretty pathetic really. My body feels like ass because of the lack of excersize, not to mention the fact I've drank more the last two weeks than the previous year and a half or so...
Sadly, I've become a light weight, to embarassing levels. It used to be I could drink a forty of Vodka before I'd be good and drunk... last night I lasted three drinks and three shots. All of which I'm sure where super watered down. Not that it's really a bad thing, other than the fact I was getting out drunk by 120 lb girls... but I guess that's what happens when you don't drink for a year, and lose a massive amount of weight (70lbs since the last time I drank). I'm sure for those of you who have read more than a little bit of this blog, you can tell the anger and frustration in my voice...
Really, it's nothing to do with this journey... more what this journey stands for by accident. I should probably explain, but really, it just doesn't matter so I won't. When you have all of the answers, you have to kind of wonder if it's even worth asking the questions I guess. Lets just say that the top of the world is the worlds most lonely place.
So I have all this anger, apparently. I guess it should be a good thing, usually anger is a great driver at this kind of thing. Oddly this doesn't feel like the kind of anger I can redirect to something useful... it's a shame though, because there is a lot of it there.
On a totally differant note, I found out this morning (after I was already pissed off) that my ex gf, to whom I once claimed I loved is getting married on my birthday this year. I gotta wonder, wtf? lol.
Another Day, Another Disapointment.
T.
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